Sappy Christmas Song Competition

There's been a lot of whining out there in the blogosphere about the sappy Christmas songs that assault our ears as we go about our daily rounds this time of year.

Last week's RevGalBlogPals Friday Five included a query on the subject. Actually, the question was "what song makes you want to stuff your ears with chestnuts roasted on an open fire?" It seems to me the RevGals think that Christmas Shoes is the worst of the worst.

Or is it?

I bet some of you can write something even worse. I KNOW you can. I've read your stuff.

In the spirit of the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest, QG is sponsoring The Sappy Christmas Song Competition.

Here are the rules:

1. The first commenter gets to begin by posting one or two lines of lyrics in the comments.
2. Each subsequent commenter can add one or two lines.
3. Extra points for those who mix religious/secular methaphors.
4. Puns are allowed--but keep them clean, this is a family-friendly blog.

QG will post the completed song when the comments trail off and then ask the readers to vote on their favorite lines. The top 3 vote getters will receive appropriate virtual prizes!

Ready, get set, get sappy!

UPDATE-- Presbyterian Gal asked if the rules could be changed so 4 lines could be posted. Since she said "pretty please"--sure. If your sappy Christmas muse is with you add as many lines as you like. Thanks to Rev Dave for getting us started. Here's what we have so far:

'Twas lonely at the manse that Christmas Eve
As the pastor's dog waited under the tree
Buster's health was failing fast
When an angel came and asked
"Hey there Buster, I come to lift
Your sorry state with a heavenly gift"
She drew out a biscuit from her robe
And held it under Buster's nose.
"Smell this old friend, isn't it fine?
Guess what! It's 'Doggie Communion Time!!!"

If you're inspired, please add more lines in the comments....