WOOF!Olivia here.
So yesterday QG took me for my annual checkup with the vet. I was very proud to see I hadn't gained any weight since the last visit.
But that wasn't enough for the doctor! Oh, no! She told QG I really need to lose a pound or two.
Not fair! I only weigh 12 pounds. That's the same as Beatrice. Okay, well, so what if she is a lot bigger than I am. I have a lovely curvaceous figure and she is a stick. HMMMPH!
Not fair! I only weigh 12 pounds. That's the same as Beatrice. Okay, well, so what if she is a lot bigger than I am. I have a lovely curvaceous figure and she is a stick. HMMMPH!
So now QG can't give me my fat-free cottage cheese (hey, doc, its FAT FREE!) and has to cut me back to 1/4 cup of food a day. No more delicious cheese snacks from El Jefe. No more mouth-watering peanut butter treats for doing my "bidness" when asked.
I tell you SOMEONE is going to be sorry!!!
Your despondent friend,
Olivia
*BARK BARK BARK*
ReplyDeleteDoes that mean you can't have popcorn? I like for my mom to throw it and me catch it in the air!
Do I need to send you a care package?
Gingerbean who thinks you are just right
No cottage cheese??
ReplyDeleteI feel your pain. Mom had to buy me a larger seat belt harness the other day, and she wasn't happy about it. She blames Dad...
Anyway, I think you're beautiful just the way you are!
Love,
Riley
Dear Beatrice,
ReplyDeleteI feel your pain. The other day I heard Dave & Kim talking about how I looked like a potato with legs. My treats have been cut back too. Meanwhile, Kim is always concerned because Redford doesn't always eat all of the 2 CUPS of puppy food he gets TWICE a day. Kim is always wondering if he's too thin. I think the other night she snuck him a dog biscuit with some peanut butter on it, because I smelled peanut butter on his breath. It's not at all fair.
Your friend in despondence,
Newman
Doggie diets are the worst - they just sit there and stare at you with those pitiful eyes saying, I'm starving! Starving, I tell you!
How about baby carrots as snacks? Healthy and low cal, but still sweet and crunchy!
ReplyDeleteOlivia -
ReplyDeleteFeeling your pain here also. After the Johann the Killer Pom got over being a puppy, I had to start eating special food to lose weight... still on it, but I do look and feel much better. Even if he is three years younger, I can still outrun the Pom across the yard!
Genevieve the bithin' bichon
Oh, Olivia... your people are doing it to you, too. Mine are calling me Tubsday. Or, simply, Fat Tuesday. And The Alpha said that tonight he is going to buy me diet dog food... And The Boy? The Boy looks svelte. No diet dog food for him. It's infuriating. I am always, ALWAYS hungry. Why don't they understand that?
ReplyDelete--Tuesday
Dear Olivia,
ReplyDeleteI think you look divine. You don't need to lose an ounce! If you want I will share some of my hay with you. My mom says it has made me very round, but round is a lovely shape. The hay is very good for you. If you don't want it though, let me know because I like to eat all of it.
Your guinea pig friend, Curly