A New Year's Rhyme

(In the spirit of the New Yorker's annual New Year poem,
QG offers her own version for 2007.)

Strike the concertina's melancholy string,
Let the soul-stirring harp play like anything.
It's time for New Year's wishes round the ring,
To RevGals, Pals and Presbybloggers I sing.

Huzzah for the RevGals who now have gone "Inc",
With lots of new bloggers now in the link!
Songbird, Reverend Mommy and St. Cassarole,
Wills Mama and Jan and a Bear on a Floe
Join in sending their wishes for the best New Year yet
To Cheesehead, Rebel, Reverendmother, Mibi, and Net.

The year 2007 could be the calmest
For Wendy, Spooky Rach, Mindy and Psalmist.
Add Mary Beth, Zorra, Dogblogger and Miranda to my list
Of Texas Bloggers whose posts cannot be missed.
May this spring bring you bluebonnets and not too much haze,
May you soar through the minutes, the months and the days.

To Pink Shoes, to Gallycat, to Cathy and Lutheran Chick
May each day bring you more blessings than you can pick.
For Rev Abi, Preacher Mom, Singing Owl and Gannet Girl,
Some excitement, some adventure to keep you in a whirl.
Gord, Deb, Grandma Jean and Teri
Should find many ways to keep themselves merry.

The New Year brings with it a chance to sow the good seed
For Kathryn, John, Stacey, Bro Greg and Vicar of Hogsmeade.
We hope that the year 2007 will prove a good date
For Emily, Jane Ellen, Iris, and Anna Straight.
Now we have a chance to make a new start
And show the love of God lives in our heart.

What will the year bring for our fellow PresbyBloggers,
Who faithfully follow PresbyDoings as loggers?
Woe betide those who try to sneak a ruse
Past Will Spotts, Beau, Toby, Denis or Michael Kruse.
Hail Andy Moye, kairos, Presbyterian Gal, Russell Smith and Pastor Lance--
May the news from Louisville not prompt you to write rants!

In the spirit of comity, peace, light and grace
QG sends greetings all over the place--
To Moderator Joan Gray and even the Clerk.
May you find a way to make the PCUSA work
Together in the New Year better than in the last,
So the fussing and fighting can be in the past.

To the RevGals and Pals in our growing webring
May 2007 many blessings bring.
And to a broken world in need
Of healing from Jesse's seed,
May the New Year bring God's love and grace
To everyone in every place.

Not A Loyalist After All

Family Geneologist-in-Chief El Jefe was thrilled with son-in-law DK's recent interest in researching the family's geneology. With some guidance from him and using the ancient sampler that I have from my father's side of the family, DK has definitively exploded some hoary family myths.

I'd always been told that my father's side of the family were Loyalists during the American Revolution, who left New York for Canada during that time and returned later. DK has pushed the geneology back to the first family member to come to the New World to live in Plymouth Colony. This man arrived on the Fortune, which was the second ship after the Mayflower to bring English settlers to this country. Furthermore his descendants fought against the British and DK even found evidence that they were awarded pensions for their service from the fledgling American government. Instead of being eligible for membership in the Daughters of the British Empire, I'm eligible for the DAR! What a shock!

So where did that story about being Loyalists come from? We do have some ancestors who were Swiss Mennonites living in Pennsylvania at that time. Since Mennonites were pacifists we're guessing that this is the part of the family that may have fled the war for Canada--particularly since some of them stayed in Canada while those who became our direct relations migrated later to Michigan. Maybe that's the source of the story. El Jefe says that after 100 years a family's memory of its past is always suspect.

One thing remains constant in all of DK's research--the family was Puritan, Reformed and Presbyterian and active in church as well as educational endeavors in their communities. It's interesting to see that remains true of most of the descendants in the 21st century.

Devotions for 2007

As the New Year approaches, I started looking for a new daily devotional guide for 2007 since the RevGals don't (sob!) have a new one available. After browsing amazon for a while, I found and ordered A Year With Jesus by Eugene Peterson from amazon. Peterson has selected 365 readings from the Gospels of Matthew and John and written meditations on them. (He's a Presbyterian minister and the author of The Message translation of the Bible and a host of other popular books.)

Since I'm going to be spending a year with the General Council of New Covenant presbytery, I figured I really, really needed to try to spend that year with Jesus, too!

What are you planning to use for a devotional guide for 2007?

Adeste Fideles--Christmas Eve 2006

Yea, Lord, we greet thee!
Born this happy morning,
Jesus, to Thee be glory given;
Word of the Father,
Now in flesh appearing:
O come let us adore Him
O come let us adore Him
O come let us adore Him
Christ the Lord

Festive Foods Friday Five

Things are slow in the Presbyblogosphere this week, thanks to preparations for Christmas observances. So let's play today's RevGals Friday Five, brought to us by reverendmother. It's all about the Festive Foods of the season.

1. Favorite cookie/candy/baked good without which, it's just not Christmas.

One of each: Turtle Cookies are El Jefe's favorite cookie because his mother made them every Christmas. See picture on the left. I don't think it's Christmas without fudge. We always have orange rolls on Christmas Day at breakfast.

2. Do you do a fancy dinner on Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, both, or neither? (Optional: with whom will you gather around the table this year?)

We used to have it on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day at my house because I have room for the whole clan. This year Portia and DK wanted to host it at their new home and decided to do it on Boxing Day (Dec. 26) because so many other family events are planned on the 24th and 25th. There will be about 20 family and friends around their festive board.

3. Evaluate one or more of the holiday beverage trifecta: hot chocolate, wassail, egg nog.

Hot chocolate is great with lots of whipped cream. Get behind me, Satan, with that Starbucks liquid chocolate thingy! No one really knows what wassail is. Spiced hot wine? Yuck. Eggnog without liquor is too rich and cloying. With liquor it's an accident (or incident!) waiting to happen.

4. Candy canes: do you like all the new-fangled flavors or are you a peppermint purist?

Last night a group of boys rang my doorbell asking for a candy cane for their scavenger hunt. I didn't have one in the house which reflects my attitude towards candy canes in general.

5. Have you ever actually had figgy pudding? And is it really so good that people will refuse to leave until they are served it?

I never had figgy pudding. But I bet if you made a good bread pudding with raisins and currants and topped it with bourbon sauce and whipped cream people would wait for it!

Brought to You by the Letter K

Over at Mindy's place there is an alphabet meme. Here's how it goes: Mindy gives you a letter and your post 10 things you love that start with that letter. Mindy gave me K. That's a tough letter, but here goes.

1. K******. The last name of my wonderful sister-in-law and brother-in-law. What a blessing they and their children have been to me!

2. King. One of the names of Jesus Christ.

3. Knowledge. You will never get enough.

4. Kerfuffle. My new favorite word. It means a commotion. Hat tip to the Scientist (zorra's husband) who taught it to me. He has the best vocabulary EVER.

5. Kleenex. One of the greatest inventions of the last century.

6. Ketosis. Every dieter's friend.

7. Knee. My right one that still works. My left one has no cartlidge left thanks to an injury when I was 20 and so is problematic now.

8. Keys. You know how much you love them when you loose them.

9. Kitchen. I love kitchens because I like to cook and I love mine which we updated a couple of years ago.

10. Keyboard. Without which I wouldn't be posting this--or blogging at all!

A Kid's Eye View of Charlotte's Web

Babs and I took my three nieces, ages 8, 6 and 4 to see Charlotte's Web yesterday afternoon. The movie is well done and faithful to the beloved book of the same name. Here's my interpretation of their reactions, which I hope will be helpful to those of you planning to take your own youngsters to this movie.

The oldest enjoyed it and followed it closely. Afterwards she told me that it was "better than the cartoon" because it included the scenes from the book where Fern brings Wilbur to school and when Wilbur meets Charlotte's offspring and names the 3 who stay. The middle niece added that there "wasn't any rain" in the cartoon while there were a couple of rainy day scenes in the movie. The youngest whispered in my ear from the minute the movie started, seeking reassurance that Wilbur wouldn't be killed in the movie and it would be like the cartoon. Clearly the cartoon version of the book has made the rounds of the preschool and elementary set and will influence the opinion of the children who have seen it.

Although my 8 year old niece followed the movie closely, both of the younger two girls found it got tedious and became restless. About 30 minutes into the movie the youngest started asking when it would be over. Ten minutes was my standard answer and seemed to satisfy her for a while until she asked again. Of course I had to take both of them to the bathroom so they could get a break. The movie, like the book, emphasizes dialogue rather than action. So I wouldn't recommend taking preschool age children to the movie unless they need to come along with older siblings. It's too long and not active enough for them.

Be prepared to discuss death and dying with the kids after they see this movie. The theme of the story is rescuing Wilbur the Pig from his intended fate as bacon and ham. Plus the heroine of the story, Charlotte the spider, dies at the end. My little four year old needed constant reassurance about Wilbur throughout the movie and at the end of it began asking questions about how and why people die.

Her reaction was probably enhanced because within five minutes of coming to my house she wanted to know where Gretel The Noble Dog was. She'd heard before that Gretel died, but started to realize what that meant when she didn't see her in her accustomed place. Then she and her sisters had to see Gretel's grave and the little marker we placed over it and ask questions about it. We had a good discussion with the girls and I think it probably helped the younger two process the movie experience.

Babs and I enjoyed the movie and I think most adults and older children and teenagers will like it. I would be cautious about taking younger children to it, however.

Upcoming Christmas Eve Marathon

Pastors and other church professionals find themselves facing truly rugged schedules when Christmas Eve or Christmas Day fall on a Sunday. This year I think that my sister, director of music ministry at a large Methodist church in San Antonio, may take the prize for craziest Christmas Eve.
There are 12 worship services planned at her church this coming Sunday. She must oversee the music at all of them, and will direct the music at 7 of them. She's planning a total melt-down on Boxing Day (December 26). No kidding! This is just nuts.

Many gentle readers are also gearing up for their own Christmas Eve marathons. I hope none of you are facing as long and difficult a day as she is.

Pets Need Christmas, Too: A Sappy Christmas Song

C'est Fini!
~cue the steel gee-tars~

And grab your hanky. The Sappy Christmas Song is dedicated by Gannet Girl to the memory of Gretel, The Noble Dog, who surely would have walked away in disgust.

Pets Need Christmas, Too

'Twas lonely at the manse that Christmas Eve
As the pastor's dog waited under the tree
Buster's health was failing fast
When an angel came and asked
"Hey there Buster, I come to lift
Your sorry state with a heavenly gift"
She drew out a biscuit from her robe
And held it under Buster's nose.
"Smell this old friend, isn't it fine?
Guess what! It's 'Doggie Communion Time!!!"

Pets need Christmas too....
Just like me and Yoooooou....
When Santa lights Jesus' birthday cake......
Pets need Christmas too................

But the offering of that angel bright was not yet done,
For as soon as she had begun,
She served old Buster a dish of wassail true
And then, the dog did feel his strength returning,
Just then, with a flash of silken fur
The minister's cat, with a lordly purr
And a silver bell hung around his neck,
Announced, "No eggnog?! What the heck?"

Pets need Christmas too....
Just like me and Yoooooou....
When Santa lights Jesus' birthday cake......
Pets need Christmas too................

But cats are notoriously intrepid and brave
Especially when it's that eggnog they crave
And this one, with feline grace and speed
Leapt to the counter with little heed
For the cookies and cakes impeding her glide
And toward the vast bowl of eggnog did slide.
and drank deeply with kitty glee
and headed off to climb the Christmas tree

Pets need Christmas too....
Just like me and Yoooooou....
When Santa lights Jesus' birthday cake......
Pets need Christmas too................

But the nog had been spiked with whiskey,
(The pastor was not baptist, you see,)
Making the kitty rocky on his feet,
And seeing not one but two trees.
In one was her own dear mama
Dead these years gone by
She was hit in the road by an eggnog truck
And lives with that Lion in the sky.

Pets need Christmas too....
Just like me and Yoooooou....
When Santa lights Jesus' birthday cake......
Pets need Christmas too................

So I sing this sad song from the kitty stockade,
Awaitin' the hangin' tree:
I'm guilty of my sainted cat mama's death,
And as sorry as a drunk cat can be.
Dear Santa, if you're hearing my song,
Give my mama a message from me.
Tell her I'll look for her at the pearly gates,
And we'll go climb St. Pete's Christmas tree.

Pets need Christmas too....
Just like me and Yoooooou....
When Santa lights Jesus' birthday cake......
Pets need Christmas too................

Many thanks to our inspired sappy lyricists: Rev Dave, Presbyterian Gal, Toby Brown, jody too, purechristianithink, gannet girl, ceemac and Psalmist.

QG's virtual awards go to:

Psalmist for contributing the last verse in which she managed to combine prison, death by hanging, a sainted mama, and St. Peter. Truly we are not worthy!

Presbyterian Gal for contributing the haunting refrain. Santa lighting Jesus' birthday cake?

Rev Dave (no blog) for setting the tone with the first two lines and starting us off.

Thursday Night Sappy Christmas Song Update

Thursday Night Update

'Twas lonely at the manse that Christmas Eve
As the pastor's dog waited under the tree
Buster's health was failing fast
When an angel came and asked
"Hey there Buster, I come to lift
Your sorry state with a heavenly gift"
She drew out a biscuit from her robe
And held it under Buster's nose.
"Smell this old friend, isn't it fine?
Guess what! It's 'Doggie Communion Time!!!"

But the offering of that angel bright was not yet done,
For as soon as she had begun,
She served old Buster a dish of wassail true
And then, the dog did feel his strength returning,
Just then, with a flash of silken fur
The minister's cat, with a lordly purr
And a silver bell hung around his neck,
Announced, "No eggnog?! What the heck?"

But cats are notoriously intrepid and brave
Especially when it's that eggnog they crave
And this one, with feline grace and speed
Leapt to the counter with little heed
For the cookies and cakes impeding her glide
And toward the vast bowl of eggnog did slide.
and drank deeply with kitty glee
and headed off to climb the Christmas tree

But the nog had been spiked with whiskey,
(The pastor was not baptist, you see,)
Making the kitty rocky on his feet,
And seeing not one but two trees.
In one was her own dear mama
Dead these years gone by
She was hit in the road by an eggnog truck
And lives with that Lion in the sky.

Kudos to contributors Rev Dave, Presbyterian Gal, Toby Brown, jody too, purechristianithink, gannet girl and moi.

Is it worse than Christmas Shoes yet???? What say you, gentle readers?

Sappy Christmas Song Update

Thanks to Rev Dave, Presbyterian Gal, Toby Brown, purechristianithink, j, too and yours truly here's our Sappy Christmas Song as of this writing:

'Twas lonely at the manse that Christmas Eve
As the pastor's dog waited under the tree
Buster's health was failing fast
When an angel came and asked
"Hey there Buster, I come to lift
Your sorry state with a heavenly gift"
She drew out a biscuit from her robe
And held it under Buster's nose.
"Smell this old friend, isn't it fine?
Guess what! It's 'Doggie Communion Time!!!"

But the offering of that angel bright was not yet done,
For as soon as she had begun,
She served old Buster a dish of wassail true
And then, the dog did feel his strength returning,
Just then, with a flash of silken fur
The minister's cat, with a lordly purr
And a silver bell hung around his neck,
Announced, "No eggnog?! What the heck?"

Let's see...so far we have a lonely manse, a sick dog, a Christmas tree, an angel, Doggie Communion biscuits, magic wassail, a Christmas miracle and now the appearance of a cat with a silver bell demanding eggnog.

The song needs a big sappy finish! Leave your suggestions in the comments.

Sappy Christmas Song Competition

There's been a lot of whining out there in the blogosphere about the sappy Christmas songs that assault our ears as we go about our daily rounds this time of year.

Last week's RevGalBlogPals Friday Five included a query on the subject. Actually, the question was "what song makes you want to stuff your ears with chestnuts roasted on an open fire?" It seems to me the RevGals think that Christmas Shoes is the worst of the worst.

Or is it?

I bet some of you can write something even worse. I KNOW you can. I've read your stuff.

In the spirit of the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest, QG is sponsoring The Sappy Christmas Song Competition.

Here are the rules:

1. The first commenter gets to begin by posting one or two lines of lyrics in the comments.
2. Each subsequent commenter can add one or two lines.
3. Extra points for those who mix religious/secular methaphors.
4. Puns are allowed--but keep them clean, this is a family-friendly blog.

QG will post the completed song when the comments trail off and then ask the readers to vote on their favorite lines. The top 3 vote getters will receive appropriate virtual prizes!

Ready, get set, get sappy!

UPDATE-- Presbyterian Gal asked if the rules could be changed so 4 lines could be posted. Since she said "pretty please"--sure. If your sappy Christmas muse is with you add as many lines as you like. Thanks to Rev Dave for getting us started. Here's what we have so far:

'Twas lonely at the manse that Christmas Eve
As the pastor's dog waited under the tree
Buster's health was failing fast
When an angel came and asked
"Hey there Buster, I come to lift
Your sorry state with a heavenly gift"
She drew out a biscuit from her robe
And held it under Buster's nose.
"Smell this old friend, isn't it fine?
Guess what! It's 'Doggie Communion Time!!!"

If you're inspired, please add more lines in the comments....

Twelve Step Program for Blackberry Addicts

Your humble correspondent has posted in the past about life with a Blackberry (a/k/a "Crack-Berry") addict before, so I was very interested in the piece in the Wall Street Journal this weekend about " Blackberry Orphans."

The article was accompanied with a suggested 12 Step Program for sufferers (only available online to WSJ online subscribers). As a Backberry Widow, I made El Jefe read both the article and the 12 steps in their entirety.

Result: El Jefe vowed to cease emailing while driving.

One step at a time!

Fa-La-La-La Friday Five

Today's Friday Five questions for the RevGals are posed by Reverendmother, whose subject is the music of the season. Here are my answers. (By the way, Blogger is acting really funky with the formatting and I'm tired of trying to fix it, so excuse the messy post, thanks.)

1. A favorite secular song.
Twelve Days of Christmas. See answer to #4, below for explanation.

2. Christmas song that chokes you up (maybe even in spite of yourself--the cheesier the better)

Mine's NOT cheesy.
I can never make it through this verse of Once In Royal David's City:

And our eyes at last shall see him,
through his own redeeming love;
for that child so dear and gentle
is our Lord in heaven above;
and he leads his children on
to the place where he is gone.

This verse and the music (and that descant!!) make me loose it every time.

3. Christmas song that makes you want to stuff your ears with chestnuts roasted on an open fire.

Can't I have more than one? (whine, whine) I can't choose between White Christmas; Chestnuts Roasting On an Open Fire; and The Little Drummer Boy (parum-pa-pum-pum to you, too!)

4. The Twelve Days of Christmas: is there *any* redeeming value to that song? Discuss.

Yes--little kids LOVE the repetition and are proud of themselves when they memorize it. I'm teaching it to my 4 and 6 year old nieces, just like I taught it to my girls when they were that age. Every Sunday when I see them we learn 3 verses and we'll finish (hopefully) by Christmas Eve in time for a little family concert.

5. A favorite Christmas album.

Messiah as performed by the English Baroque Soloists and the Montiverdi Choir
This version is done in the original style of Handel, not the lush overproduced Mormon Tabernacle Choir and huge orchestra version.

Atheist Church Member Update, Part Two

Those of my readers who have followed the saga of the atheist who was admitted to membership in St. Andrews' Presbyterian Church in Austin will want to check out the latest update on the situation provided by Toby Brown at A Classical Presbyterian.

On the one hand the Synod of the Sun denied the St Andrews request for an injunction against Mission Presbytery's resolutions that authorized its Committee on Ministry to counsel with the church about asking the appropriate constitutional membership questions for those who want to join the church. So St Andrews must cooperate with that counseling.

On the other hand they are setting up a symposium at Austin Presbyterian Seminary to discuss whether or not the English word "Lord" is required in membership and ordination vows. It's unclear whether a symposium has any standing in Presbyterian polity under the Book of Order. I'm going to say that it doesn't so it won't matter one whit what anyone says there.

Good grief.

The Bible As Widget?

There's nothing like perusing the Wall Street Journal to find your blogging muse. Today's post is inspired by an article in the WSJ's Leisure & Arts section: Heavens, Bibles Are Really Booming by Joanne Kaufman.

The folks at the WSJ, being the committed capitalists that they are, require that you subscribe to their online site (or have a print subscription) to access the article. But never mind, QG is here to tell you all about it.

Ever been in the Bibles section of your local mega-bookstore and wondered who thought up all those versions? You'll find a women's Bible, a men's Bible, Bibles for teens and children or bibles with themes such as leadership, archaeology, or sports. Zondervan has a Bible in a Bag and is soon publishing "Immerse" the water-resistant version. Kevin O'Brien, director of Bibles at Tyndale House, is quoted in the article as saying, "people are seeing their lives not just in color but high definition color, and they want the Bible to fit in with that. This is not your Mother's Bible."

You can say that again. The article reports that Tyndale House will bring out a paperback Bible next spring that comes in a plastic case that looks like a flattened Nalgene bottle. That's in case the Bibles in your college colors, camouflage, metal or duct tape don't appeal.

Publishers apparently do have some limits. Thomas Nelson Inc. declined to publish a "sort of alarmist Bible" which featured headlines from USA Today of the fighting in Israel and Lebanon as well as the breakup of Jessica Simpson's marriage. They also take a dim view of the "Jesus Loves Porn Stars" version of the Bible distributed at last summer's erotica convention in Los Angeles. While its true that Jesus loves even porn stars, it was felt that this crossed the line between sacred and profane.

"The question is always how do we create Bibles that people will pick up and use but will not be too gimicky," Mr. O'Brien is reported as saying. "If you get too trendy, you've turned the Bible into a widget."

Hmmm. Methinks there are a lot of widget Bibles out there.

Agreed Judgment in FPC Baton Rouge Property Case

The Presbytery of South Louisiana and First Presbyterian Church of Baton Rouge have entered into an agreed final judgment respecting the church’s petition to clear title to its property. A summary and links to the text of the judgment and the original petition filed by the church are available on its website here.

The judgment concludes that all property of the church is owned solely by the church and that neither the presbytery nor any agency acting through the presbytery may control the use and ownership of the church’s property. In short, the denomination has no trust interest in the property.

This is a very interesting case, but one that does not have broad application to other churches in the PCUSA. First Presbyterian Church of Baton Rouge has a particular history that together with the laws of the state of Louisiana, make its legal situation distinguishable from that of most other churches.

Most importantly, FPC was a PCUS church at the time of reunion. In 1987 the congregation exercised its right to declare its exemption from the “trust clause” of the PCUSA under G-8.0700 of the Book of Order. Furthermore, from the time the church was founded in 1827, it was never affiliated with any denomination that claimed a “trust” interest on its property.

The church’s claim that it had never taken any action in the past that would create an express or implied trust under Louisiana law was agreed to by the presbytery as well.

The petition was brought to clear title to the church's property as it planned a new capital campaign. According to the statements on the website, there is no plan to withdraw from the PCUSA at this time. The fact that the Presbytery of South Louisiana did not contest the petition, but stipulated that the facts alleged in it were true and entered into an agreed judgment that was approved at the November presbytery meeting is a credit to all involved.

Dr. Gerrit Dawson, senior pastor of FPC Baton Rouge commended the executive presbyter of South Louisiana in his letter to the congregation, saying "Dr. Cutter does not believe the denomination should be held together by property and trust clauses but rather through shared faith, mission and love in Christ." Dr. Dawson hopes that "our Presbytery’s action will be an example for the entire denomination. Unity forced by holding someone’s property title as a trump card is not unity nor the path to renewal".

While I earnestly share Dr. Dawson's hope, I think we must also recognize that the facts and circumstances surrounding this case limit its application to other churches. But I pray that the gracious and pastoral attitude displayed by this presbytery and its leaders will be an inspiration to other presbyteries and the folks in Louisville in resolving other property disputes in the future. For surely the PCUSA will not be held together by litigation but only by "shared faith, mission and love in Christ."

Christmas Gift Idea From Joel Osteen

Just in time for Christmas Your Best Life Now The Game is now available. ($34.99 retail. Less online.)

"The game enables players to step beyond the one-on-one nature of the book and feel, touch and live Joel’s 7 Steps to Living at Your Full Potential," according to amazon.com.

It is based on Joel Osteen's best selling book Your Best Life Now. Joel Osteen is the "co-pastor" (along with wife Victoria) of Lakewood Church in Houston.

Also Known As: The Oasis of Love. Motto: Discover the Champion in You. Location: former NBA arena.

Following the book's 7 chapters, the game has 7 levels and the winner of the game is the one who first reaches the end of Level 7--Choose To Be Happy. The winner gets to open the MY MIRACLE envelope and reads the goals and promises all other players wrote down at the beginning of the game. Then the "losers" must now help the winner reach his/her goals by "living your best life now."

You know, I can't make up this stuff.

A spokesman for Lakewood was quoted in the Houston Chronicle saying that the church will not sell the board game because it does not fit "the message of the ministry." That's because he thinks the content of the game is "a little simplistic" compared to the book. (??!!???) He claims that the game "slipped between the cracks" and was not approved by the church before it was published. In fairness, he says the game doesn't represent Osteen's message about Jesus.

Whatever. All I know is Lakewood Church is a veritable font of blogging inspiration.

Santa Too Religious For School

The Christmas Crazies have arrived. See story here.

~sound of head banging on table~