Thursday, September 03, 2009

Mom of Congress: Opening Day Assignments

Dear Congress Boys and Girls,

CongressMom hopes that you enjoyed your August break, even though some of you had a better time than others. I have been getting everything ready for the first day of the new session.

CongressMom was saddened to hear that some of you exhibited very poor deportment over the break. Shelia Jackson Lee, I am talking to YOU! Hand me that cell phone right now. When you return, you are to report directly to the Time Out Room for the first week of the session.

Now, it has also come to my attention that a big clique has formed and will not work with those who are not in the clique. This is not acceptable behavior in Congress, boys and girls! We have to learn to work together and co-operate. Can you say "CO-OPERATE"? It is a big word, boys and girls, but it is a very important word.

CongressMom needs to teach each of you the meaning of that word, so when you return you will have assigned seats and be divided into groups to write your bills. The health care reform bills you wrote in the last session were so poorly written that poor CongressMom could not understand them, so she threw them away. You are going to have to start over boys and girls!

Each group will have liberals, moderates and conservatives and you will be expected to learn how to work together and write a bill that everyone in the group can agree on no matter how long it takes. Pay attention when you write that bill because you will be tested to see how much of it you remember after your group turns it in. Yes, that means you are expected to read it. All of it.

Enjoy the rest of your recess,

Mom of Congress

3 comments:

Presbyterian Gal said...

You tell 'em Congress Mom!!!

jean said...

YeeeHaw!

Rev Kim said...

You go, Congress Mom!!! Yay!!!