Tilda Blogs: Note to Beatrice

Dear Beatrice,

Woof! Tilda here. I've been really busy these last few weeks. That's why I haven't been over to your house every day like I used to be. Here's a picture of me and my new baby. See me lick my lips! His feet taste good.

Averill won't let me near him unless she's close by. She took the picture.

I'm very important now. If someone comes in I have to run to the door and hop around and bark to let Averill know someone is here. Then I have to roll over and let them rub my tummy.

If baby cries I have to run around in circles. If Averill spends too much time holding him I have to try to jump on the couch so she can hold me too. I think that's when she calls QG to come take me to see you for a while.

I'm glad to come over because it's exhausting helping take care of a baby.

Duty calls! Woof!

Tilda

Beatrice Blogs: Hounds Rule!

Woof!
Beatrice here.

Last night QG and I watched the Westminster Dog Show whilst El Jefe was otherwise engaged in watching some game with a ball on TV.

I was sad  that one of my peeps didn't win the Hound group. Of course, technically speaking, piebald dachsies like myself are not "recognized" here. 

Hello? Let me introduce myself, I'm Beatrice and I'm a brown and cream short hair piebald dachshund. There!

At least the Hound group ruled! The biggest hound dog we have ever seen won Best In Show.

Hickory the Scottish Deerhound

Hey, Hickory, we have lots of deer around here. In fact last night QG saw one dart out in front of a car ahead of her near our house. Score: Car 1, Deer 0.  So sad. Want to come visit? I can help flush them out and you can bring 'em down.

Frankly, I was betting on Mr. Baggins, the bearded Collie, because his name was so descriptive!

Mr. Baggins

And your faves were?

Beatrice Blogs: Tilda Update

Matilda "Tilda"

Woof! 

Beatrice here. QG and El Jefe figured out that I am technically Tilda's Aunt Bea.

Lately I've been feeling more like Tilda's Great-Aunt Bea.

I mean, that pup is full of energy! She rushes in the house in the morning when Portia drops her off before going to work and wants to wrestle and pin me to the ground. Not very dignified for a young lady dog of my age!

So when I jump on a chair or couch to get away from her, she barks! Then QG comes and scolds her and takes her away to give me a bit of peace and quiet.

I am taking her in hand--er, paw. She is learning to do business very promptly outside and to walk on a leash. I've shown her all the best places to look for rabbits or little mice in the yard. She has a good nose and runs pretty fast, but not as fast as me.

Although I really hate the crate, I find it amusing to get in there before Tilda does. Just to show her that I can.

I'm kind of relieved when she goes home, but then I find myself looking for her in the morning. I still miss Olivia, but I think Tilda will be a good dog, too!

Yours for contented canine companionship,

Beatrice

Beatrice Blogs: Meet Matilda

WOOF!

Beatrice here. I'm wagging my tail so hard that my behind is about to fall off. This morning Portia came in on her way to work and dropped off her new puppy--Matilda. She told me to call her Tilda.

Tilda came from the same Dachshund Ranch in Brenham where Olivia and I were born. Poor little thing is not a piebald like us. She's a long haired black and tan. Kinda cute though.

Portia missed Olivia very very much and decided she wanted to get a puppy and get her trained before Baby comes. You know what that means, don't you? It's up to me to show Tilda where and when to do business, bark, sleep, be adorable and generally not disgrace the family.

QG says she is counting on me to set a good example. I know I can do it, too! But first I must find my copy of Puppies for Dummies. Not for me, for QG.

Oops, Tilda just woke up. Duty calls.

Yours faithfully,

Beatrice.

Beatrice Blogs: Olivia Responding

Woof! Beatrice here to say many thanks for the prayers and encouraging words for Olivia. 

This evening the vet says she is responding well to the antibiotic and the blood transfusion. She's not out of the woods yet but I'm hopeful she'll keep getting better. Poor thing will have more tests tomorrow, but I hope they tell her to put up with it so she can come home soon.

All for now,
Beatrice

Beatrice Blogs: Pray for Olivia

Woof! Beatrice here.

I'm very worried about my BFF Olivia. Portia and DK had to take her to the emergency vet hospital yesterday afternoon because she wasn't keeping her food down. And then she wouldn't eat. Imagine Olivia refusing a piece of cheese! She has to be really sick.

This morning QG rushed over to their house because they got word Olivia is in liver failure. The vet is doing an ultrasound this morning and the good news is that a lot of the possible causes are treatable. However, we are all very worried about her.

It's all so sudden! She was fine Friday when she spent the day with me as usual. They won't let me visit her, either.

I'll keep you posted.

Despondently yours,
Beatrice

Beatrice Blogs: Les Lapins 0, Moi 3

Woof!

Olivia and I have banished the Suburban Rabbit Huntin' Blues Chez QG.

This weekend I bagged my third (count 'em!) rabbit and gave it up to El Jefe. I don't like eating rabbit--I much prefer pork--but it's all about the thrill of the hunt.

Olivia spotted a rabbit earlier this week in the front yard and dashed through the front gate after it. She's just getting started in the rabbit-hunting game, though, and lost her prey. Whilst the rabbit skittered across the street to safety she was still in the front flower beds howling and searching for it. I'm going to give her a lesson in following the scent later this afternoon. When QG isn't watching....

Meanwhile El Jefe put chicken wire on the front gate to keep Olivia from getting out onto the street. There's construction on both sides of the house right now and those big trucks are a real hazard to little dachsies.

Yours for a Rabbit Free Zone,
Beatrice

Reverend in the Sky?

Yesterday evening while El Jefe and I were taking Bea for her evening walk we saw this cloud that looked like a Founding Father to us.

Maybe it's the Rev. John Witherspoon, PresbyPastor and Declaration of Independence signer, come to watch over the doin's at the GA over the Fourth of July weekend in Minneapolis.

We certainly hope so!

Suburban Rabbit Huntin' Blues

Bea ain't nothin' but a hound dog
Huntin' all the time.
No, she ain't nothin' but a hound dog
Huntin' all the time.
Last night she almost caught a rabbit
Which wouldn't have been too fine.

Cause when a dachsie gets a rabbit
You know its a real big mess.
Yes when a dachsie gets a rabbit
It's a real big mess
She'd proudly bring it back to El Jefe
Who'd have to clean it up, no less.

Bea's a suburban hound dog,
But she's huntin' all the time.
Quail, birds, mice and rabbits
You know she's huntin' y'all the time.
She may get a rabbit yet
I'm givin' you this warning sign.

~harmonica riff~

Beatrice Blogs: Happy With a Real Dog's Life

Woof! Beatrice, your Canine Correspondent here.

QG left the front section of the Wall Street Journal on the floor this weekend and I got to reading this article about how American Parents Go to the Dogs After the Kids Leave.

Verrry interesting, I say. Portia and Babs are gone but I don't notice QG and El Jefe chauffeuring me and Olivia around to compete in dog sports, take agility classes, and make play dates with their friends' dogs. Sounds like a hectic life to me. Don't think we would like that. It might interrupt Olivia's power naps and the time I need to spend barking at the birds in the backyard.

~nudge from Olivia~

Okay, so Olivia reminds me that one time they took us to the new dog park in the neighborhood. No other dogs were there and I had fun running up and down a ramp. But Olivia didn't like it. She sniffed all around the perimeter and then whined to be picked up. She must have some Yankee genes in her somewhere 'cause she doesn't seem to like wide open spaces.

Olivia and I chewed up that article real good so QG wouldn't get any ideas. We're happy with a walk or two a day.

Yours for a Real Dog's Life,

Beatrice

Beatrice Blogs: St. Patrick Inspires Our New Business

WOOF!

Beatrice here.

Olivia and I have decided to start a new business--snake sniffing out. We're announcing it today in honor of St. Patrick who drove all the snakes out of Ireland.

Sunday evening we made our cornered a snake for QG and El Jefe. The viper had the affrontery to be lolling around in the flowerbeds.

We snarled and barked and snarled and growled and barked until El Jefe came out to investigate.

"Its no mere garden snake!" he exclaimed and picked it up with a broomhandle and tossed it over the back fence.

The snake in question was about a foot long and a couple of inches thick with lots of grayish markings. QG wondered if it was a young rattlesnake, it being springtime and all. But we don't know.

We're very proud of ourselves.

And we're cheap. We'll sniff out your snakes for a peanut butter flavored dog treat. Call us at 1-800-SNAKEAWAY and ask for the 2 Dachsies. Don't call the house. QG doesn't approve.

Just remember:

Saint Patrick was a gentleman
Who through strategy and stealth
Drove all the snakes from Ireland
Here's a drinkee to his health!
But not too many drinkees
Lest we lose ourselves and then...
Forget the good Saint Patrick
And see them snakes again!
~Author unknown

Looking forward to helping you NOT see the snakes again,

Beatrice

Olivia Blogs: Beatrice, Scourge of Kitties

Woof! Olivia here.

I'm checking in because it is my duty to give a report on Beatrice's deportment while El Jefe and QG were on vacation. And it wasn't quite as stellar as the pet sitter reported. Oh no.

All the pet sitter saw was Beatrice on best behavior. But at the end of the day when we were at Portia's house for the night, Beatrice turned into the Scourge of Kitties. (Portia and DK have two cats.)

WOOF! WOOF! Beatrice here--move over Olivia! I'm not the only one who likes to chase kitties.

~SHOVE ~

Olivia back again. Sorry Bea, this is my post. Get your own.

Well, the fracas escalated on Thursday to the point that Subi (a/k/a the Fraidy Cat) got so freaked that she lost all control of her...ahem...bodily functions all over Portia. That did it. Now Portia thinks it is a bad idea for Beatrice to sleep over more than a couple of nights.

Phooey. Anybody got any tips for training Beatrice to be sweet to Subi and Cleo? Anybody want to bet this can be done?

Your practically perfect in every way pet correspondent,

Olivia
Don't hate me cause I'm gorgeous

Bea and Olivia: Holiday Bling!

Woof! Beatrice here.

Double Woof! Olivia over here, too!

Beatrice: How do you like our new holiday collars? My old one was really bulky and uncomfortable. I think it made my neck look fat. It was also brown and brown. I think the red is more flattering to my skin tones, don't you?

Olivia: I was SO embarrased by my old collar. Loved the hot pink color but half the bling on it had fallen off. Lookin' shabby, I tell you. A girl likes to sparkle at Christmas you know! Now we're stylin'.

Note from QG: Remember Pets Need Christmas, Too! And speaking of that Sappy Christmas Song, don't forget to keep adding your verses to our 2009 version in the comments on the post below. An update will be posted tomorrow!

Who Wore It Better, Redux

Over at Portia's blog, Olivia is demanding a recount!

Dachsie Holiday Fashion Quiz

Portia bought Olivia an outfit for Christmas this weekend, so of course Beatrice had to try it on, too.

Who wears it better?

OLIVIA?

or

BEATRICE?

Olivia Responds: Bea Wasn't So Good Herself

Woof Yourself!

Olivia Here.

Beatrice is a Big Tattletale. So there!

And she isn't so good herself, either. Portia made us both spend Saturday afternoon in Time Out in the yard because Beatrice kept chasing DK's cats.

Okay, so I chase them too. But Beatrice started it!

Yours for setting the record straight,

Olivia

Beatrice Blogs: Olivia's Poor Deportment

Woof! Beatrice here.

This weekend QG and El Jefe were out of town so I went to stay with Portia and DK. But on Thursday and Friday they had to work so QG found a Doggy Day Care facility near our house.

I'm very sad to report that Olivia disgraced the family name by snarling at the other dogs in the day care area so we had to spend the day in the time-out room (a/k/a day boarding kennel) instead of being able to hang out with the other pooches.

Portia was mortified when she came to pick us up and learned that Olivia got an N (needs improvement) in deportment. Now QG is wondering what's the best way to teach her better behavior around other dogs. She is pretty good with one or two small dogs her size but acts up when the dogs are larger or there are more of them.

Embarrassingly yours,
Beatrice

Beatrice Blogs: QG's Dachsie Day Care

Woof! Beatrice here with a report on QG's latest enterprise--dachsie day care.

Ever since Portia and DK moved into the neighborhood, I've been seeing a lot more of my sister Olivia. It seems that QG has opened a dachsie day care on me. Portia drops her off on her way to work and then picks her up on her way home.

This means my day is much more interesting. Here's our schedule:

Eight thirtyish--Olivia arrives. We have to lick each other, give the kiss of peace, and run around the house shoulder to shoulder.

Eight-fifty--Exhausted from our greetings, so its time for a morning nap.

Note that nap can be interrupted by people ringing the doorbell, coming and going, QG getting up from her desk, the phone ringing, or a noise outside. Then we must bark. Yes, we're light sleepers!

Noonish--Time for food! Our favorite is venison/rice/sweet potato dry food with a cottage cheese garnish. Nonfat cottage cheese of course because Olivia is...well it must be said...a bit chubby.

Afternoon--naps after lunch all around. Occasional forays outside if its not too hot for water, bird chasing, sunning and rolling in the grass.

Sixish--Portia returns for Olivia. Whew! It's been a hard day. But I like having company, especially when no one is home.

Evening--naps interrupted by evening walks with El Jefe and QG. Don't know what goes on with Olivia at Portia's. But there are some cats to chase there and I hope Olivia remembers whose side she is on.

Beatrice, her mark

Beatrice Blogs: A Dog's Life at Dunclutha

WOOF! Beatrice here to tell you what I did on vacation. QG and El Jefe took me down to Dunclutha (their bay house at Port Alto) for a week. Don't I look RELAXED?

Oh, Olivia came, too, because DK and Portia were busy working and getting ready to move next Saturday.

Olivia and I got in lots of naps. In between naps we protected the place by barking fiercely and chasing after every big dog--labs, golden retrievers, and collies--that we saw. They all ran away from us! Well, until Sunday when a pair of labs chased us back. We do love us a ride in the golf cart. It helps us find those big dogs where they live and give them some what for.

QG and El Jefe are SO FUNNY when they try to chase us and stop us from running after them! It's our very favoritist game. That and chewing the weather stripping when QG and El Jefe left us inside to go to town for dinner. I don't know why they made frowny faces when they got back. Wasn't that what it is for?

Now we're back and Olivia went home. QG says she'll soon be living very close and can come play more often. Good! We'll find some big dogs in the neighborhood, I just know it.

WOOF!

Your friend, Beatrice

Beatrice Blogs: Me-1, Mice-0

WOOF!

Beatrice reporting back in. Abby, the schnauzer down the street showed me how to find the mice in the vacant lot. She got 4 of them in her garage last week!

Yesterday I went on a walk with El Jefe and showed him my new trick! I got one, too. He took it away from me because he was afraid I'd eat it. But I just wanted him to see my kill.

I'm thinking that Abby and I will make a great team around our new neighborhood.

Terminatingly yours,

Beatrice The Bold, Scourge of Mice