Thanks to Rev. Dave, Reformed Catholic, Rev. Kim, Presbyterian Gal and Spooky Rach, we now have a truly Sappy Christmas song shaping up (see post below for the Advent Venting Song Update). Here's what we have so far:
Snow was softly falling, the luminarias were lit
As she sat by the window waiting for a visit
From those she loved and missed the most
Flyin' in on Christmas Eve from the coast.
She and her puppy had donned matching Christmas sweaters.
But as the snow began falling more heavily, she wondered about the weather.
Would her loved ones safely arrive,
And then into the eggnog, treats, & presents they would dive?
Or would they get stuck in the airport, or worse, on the road.
Would melancholy silence ring throughout her abode?
Alas, she breathed a deep sigh & nibbled a piece of fudge.
While her be-sweatered best friend gave her a loving nudge.
Her cup of hot cocoa went flying straight up
when the St. Bernard Yuley knocked over her cup,
and her prosthetic leg fell down to the floor,
as she chuckled and adjusted the oxygen she wore.
She reached for her journal to jot down a thought
and stopped to admire all the gifts that she'd bought
for uncles and aunts, cousins, nephews and a niece adopted from abroad from an orphanage in Greece.
As she surveyed the hot liquid she now had to mop,
She was too good-hearted to lament that she'd to hop
while dragging the spongemop out to clean up the mess,
Her plastic leg on the ground, totally useless.
That journal could wait, though her therapist wouldn't be happy.
There were more spots to clean 'cause the house looked real crappy.
Her nieces, her uncles, and her dear sainted mama,
Wouldn't be happy with this dirty house drama.
Get out the Swiffer,
and get out the Pledge.
Clean out the dust
put a shine on that ledge.
As she sat by the window waiting for a visit
From those she loved and missed the most
Flyin' in on Christmas Eve from the coast.
She and her puppy had donned matching Christmas sweaters.
But as the snow began falling more heavily, she wondered about the weather.
Would her loved ones safely arrive,
And then into the eggnog, treats, & presents they would dive?
Or would they get stuck in the airport, or worse, on the road.
Would melancholy silence ring throughout her abode?
Alas, she breathed a deep sigh & nibbled a piece of fudge.
While her be-sweatered best friend gave her a loving nudge.
Her cup of hot cocoa went flying straight up
when the St. Bernard Yuley knocked over her cup,
and her prosthetic leg fell down to the floor,
as she chuckled and adjusted the oxygen she wore.
and stopped to admire all the gifts that she'd bought
for uncles and aunts, cousins, nephews and a niece adopted from abroad from an orphanage in Greece.
As she surveyed the hot liquid she now had to mop,
She was too good-hearted to lament that she'd to hop
while dragging the spongemop out to clean up the mess,
Her plastic leg on the ground, totally useless.
That journal could wait, though her therapist wouldn't be happy.
There were more spots to clean 'cause the house looked real crappy.
Her nieces, her uncles, and her dear sainted mama,
Wouldn't be happy with this dirty house drama.
Get out the Swiffer,
and get out the Pledge.
Clean out the dust
put a shine on that ledge.
She was hopping around,
like a dervish whirling.
While outside the snow,
was drifting and swirling.
like a dervish whirling.
While outside the snow,
was drifting and swirling.
Are you going to leave our heroine mired in housework on Christmas Eve? I think not. Add your stanza in the comments.
4 comments:
A ring of the doorbell startled her and sent her cleaning supplies aflight,
It was too early for her loved ones to arrive on this snowy night.
Who would it be standing on her front porch;
UPS, or perhaps a long-lost love, for whom she still carried a torch?
None of the above why Ho Ho Ho of course!
It was Santa himself, belly jiggling, as he tied up his horse.
"I've come here in person," he said with a grin
"To make sure all is ready and you have plenty of gin"
"Why Santa" she said, blushing down to her toe
I'm the luckiest paraplegic that anyone could know!!
ROFLOL at PG!
"But where are the raindeer", she asked quite perplexed,
"You know, Dancer & Prancer, Rudolph and the rest?"
"Early retirement", he said with a twinkle.
"So this year I came up with a great, brand new wrinkle".
"I got me a horse, to pull on my sled",
As she looked at the horse, it said "I am Mr. Ed !!".
This startled her so, she fell on her rear,
Which caused Santa to lean forward, "Let me help you up, my dear'.
As he made some hot toddys, and gave Ed an oat bag,
She sat dazed and confused, and not at all glad.
To see a horse, one that talks, quite tall at the shoulder
standing in her living room, bright as brass, but bolder !!
As she sipped her hot toddy, and Santa finished cleaning.
She put on some CDs, and Mr. Ed starting singing.
A nice baritone, a rich and full voice.
'O little town of Bethlehem', a very lovely choice.
Post a Comment