Saturday, November 05, 2005

Updating the Golden Oldies

Here's a light-hearted look at how aging rock stars will revise their lyrics to relate to their equally aging fans--thanks to my brother for sending it along.

1. Mrs. Brown, You've Got a Lovely Walker--Herman's Hermits
2. How Can You Mend a Broken Hip?--The Bee Gees
3. Splish, Splash, I Was Havin' a Flash--Bobby Darin
4. I Get By With A Little Help From Depends--Ringo Starr
5. The First Time Ever I Forgot Your Face--Roberta Flack
6. I Can't See Clearly Now--Johnny Nash
7. Fifty Ways To Loose Your Liver--Paul Simon
8. Once, Twice, Three Times To the Bathroom--The Commodores
9. Heard it Through the Grape Nuts--Marvin Gaye
10. A Whiter Shade of Hair--Procol Harem
11. You Make Me Feel Like Napping--Leo Sayer
12. Papa's Got a Kidney Stone--The Temptations
13. Denture Queen--Abba
14. Knock 3 Times on the Ceiling If You Hear Me Fall--Tony Orlando
15. I Am Woman Hear Me Snore--Helen Reddy
16. On the Commode Again--Willie Nelson
17. It's My Procedure and I'll Cry If I Want To--Leslie Gore

I don't know why there are only 17, there should be 20, shouldn't there? Gentle readers, can you supply the missing 3 or more? Here's one: Brown Spots--The Rolling Stones.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

Those are really funny. (And this middle-aged woman needed a laugh.)

HeyJules said...

Now that was good for a giggle!