Yesterday while I was editing the church newsletter for March I noticed a couple of articles about the meaning of Lent and the notice about our Ash Wednesday service. That prompted me to think about my own conflicted feelings about the upcoming Ash Wednesday services.
When I grew up in south Texas Presbyterians and other mainline Protestants like the Methodists and Baptists did not observe Ash Wednesday with a service or the imposition of ashes ceremony. You went to school on Ash Wednesday to see the foreheads of your Catholic friends and teachers smudged. Your Episcopalian and Lutheran friends went to a service that evening. But I can't ever remember an Ash Wednesday service in the Presbyterian church.
In those days and in that place there was a clearly defined difference between Catholic (or litugical churches like the Episcopalians and Lutherans) and the "low church" Protestants like us. Having clean foreheads on Ash Wednesday defined who we were as much as the fact that our church had no bishops and our ministers were married. We did observe Maundy Thursday with communion and Good Friday with a solemn noon hour service of remembrance. But we didn't pray the Stations of the Cross or engage in an all-night Easter vigil.
A number of years ago when I was chair of our Worship Committee the pastor began scheduling an Ash Wednesday service, complete with the imposition of ashes. As I recall, he told me that because we had a number of members who came from Catholic, Lutheran and Episcopalian traditions, he thought it met a need in the congregation and could also be an outreach to the community. I told him at the time that I understood his position, but I hoped that those who chose to attend the service without coming forward for ashes would not be made uncomfortable because El Jefe and I would be in that group.
Of course our church was not alone in starting to observe Ash Wednesday in this way. Out of curiousity I cruised the websites of several other local PCUSA churches yesterday and found that all of them have Ash Wednesday services scheduled. Some sites stated that ashes would be imposed and some didn't say, but I assume they will include that in the service. Today this is a widespread practice in all the churches that did not do this when I was young.
I believe in observing the liturgical season of Lent. I think that having a service to mark its beginning is appropriate. It is important to me to either give up something or take on something new for Lent as a spiritual discipline. Attending Maundy Thursday communion and Good Friday service are as much a part of the observance of Easter week as the triumphant Easter morning worship.
But I cannot part with my traditional upbringing and participate in the imposition of ashes. For several years when I sang with our choir it was very uncomfortable to sing in the Ash Wednesday service and then remain in the pews (the choir seats face the congregation) during that part of the service along with a few other hard-core traditionalists. I wish I could find a Wednesday Lent Begins Service that didn't include the ash ceremony, but called us to reprentance and reflection for the season.
Those of you who grew up in churches that always observed Ash Wednesday with traditional liturgy probably can not understand why this is a problem for me. But perhaps there are others of you who will say with me "no ashes please."
When I grew up in south Texas Presbyterians and other mainline Protestants like the Methodists and Baptists did not observe Ash Wednesday with a service or the imposition of ashes ceremony. You went to school on Ash Wednesday to see the foreheads of your Catholic friends and teachers smudged. Your Episcopalian and Lutheran friends went to a service that evening. But I can't ever remember an Ash Wednesday service in the Presbyterian church.
In those days and in that place there was a clearly defined difference between Catholic (or litugical churches like the Episcopalians and Lutherans) and the "low church" Protestants like us. Having clean foreheads on Ash Wednesday defined who we were as much as the fact that our church had no bishops and our ministers were married. We did observe Maundy Thursday with communion and Good Friday with a solemn noon hour service of remembrance. But we didn't pray the Stations of the Cross or engage in an all-night Easter vigil.
A number of years ago when I was chair of our Worship Committee the pastor began scheduling an Ash Wednesday service, complete with the imposition of ashes. As I recall, he told me that because we had a number of members who came from Catholic, Lutheran and Episcopalian traditions, he thought it met a need in the congregation and could also be an outreach to the community. I told him at the time that I understood his position, but I hoped that those who chose to attend the service without coming forward for ashes would not be made uncomfortable because El Jefe and I would be in that group.
Of course our church was not alone in starting to observe Ash Wednesday in this way. Out of curiousity I cruised the websites of several other local PCUSA churches yesterday and found that all of them have Ash Wednesday services scheduled. Some sites stated that ashes would be imposed and some didn't say, but I assume they will include that in the service. Today this is a widespread practice in all the churches that did not do this when I was young.
I believe in observing the liturgical season of Lent. I think that having a service to mark its beginning is appropriate. It is important to me to either give up something or take on something new for Lent as a spiritual discipline. Attending Maundy Thursday communion and Good Friday service are as much a part of the observance of Easter week as the triumphant Easter morning worship.
But I cannot part with my traditional upbringing and participate in the imposition of ashes. For several years when I sang with our choir it was very uncomfortable to sing in the Ash Wednesday service and then remain in the pews (the choir seats face the congregation) during that part of the service along with a few other hard-core traditionalists. I wish I could find a Wednesday Lent Begins Service that didn't include the ash ceremony, but called us to reprentance and reflection for the season.
Those of you who grew up in churches that always observed Ash Wednesday with traditional liturgy probably can not understand why this is a problem for me. But perhaps there are others of you who will say with me "no ashes please."
13 comments:
Hi QG--I grew up with it, so I'm curious what it represents to you and what troubles you about it, since I have to admit that I take it for granted as part of my spiritual life.
I find the solemn experience of marking the foreheads of people I love, acknowledging that our lives are imperfect and short, to be an important part of Lent for me.
I think that because I grew up in a heavily Catholic city (San Antonio), the distinction between Protestants and Catholics was very important in defining my faith and who I was. Imposition of ashes was a very visible symbol of identification as a Catholic to me.
It wasn't something that was done in Presbyterian, Methodist or Baptist churches in the area where I grew up. I never attended a church that did this until a few years ago.
I recognize its importance for so many faithful Christians, but because of those formative experiences I don't relate to it the way those who grew up attending the traditional Ash Wednesday service.
I admit this is more of an emotional than an intellectual response--particularly in today's more ecumenical climate. My feelings may well be limited to those of my age group with similar upbringing and experiences.
The power of the imposition of ashes struck me the most when I made the sign of the cross on my daughter's forehead when she was very young. It was a tender moment of realizing how fragile we all are.
However, that being said, I understand some of what you describe. The readings for the day that talk about rending your heart and not your garments always seems so incongruous with the activity of the ashes. I also had a very loud spoken parishioner who objected to the practice for the same reason.
After a few years of Wednesdays went by, I began to see it in a new way. I still receive the ashes as a reminder of my mortality and my sinfulness. But I was my face as soon as possible after worship. I don't wear the ashes as an outward sign of where I've been or who I am. My penitence remains within the privacy of the sanctuary. For me, this is a good way to start the season of Lent. It won't work for everyone, but as a Lutheran and a lover of liturgical signs that are both felt and spoken- it works.
QG, you may have noticed in past years that J. and I are completely with you on this, as are a few other folks (nearly all of those folks being cradle Presbyterians or ex-Baptists of a certain age). I have grown to have a great appreciation and love for liturgy and ritual, but am uncomfortable with this particular outward expression of penitence.
Maybe I'm just trying to justify my own hideboundedness on theological grounds, but as far as I know the imposition of ashes has never been a part of the Reformed tradition, and although I find the Ash Wednesday service meaningful to mark the beginning of Lent, I prefer not to receive ashes.
I share a similar upbringing with a huge number of catholic friends all wearing the ashes on Ash Wednesday. My Protestant family and freinds did not attend service on Ash Wednesday and I was surprised to find a Protestant service down here in the South (I didnt' realize it was new to you too). I'm with you on abstaining from ashes and would like to think it stemed from something other that my childhood upbringing and memories, but I probably have no logically based reason for it. I guess I'm typically the one to express the feeling of show you are a Christian to the world and use words (and outward symbols) only if necessary. Of course in todays hugely visual world it probably has a real draw for young people to show their faith in this way.
Like Emily, this has always been part of my faith practice (not surprising for another Episcopalian), so I never thought of it as a denominational distinctive in the way you have-- even though I also grew up in a heavily RC area.
We were taught to wash our faces after the service, however, lest we be "displaying our piety before men." The reminder of the fragility of life, and our dependence upon God, was important-- proving that we had been to service was not.
I will say, however, that you would be welcome at my altar to remain in your pew in prayer, or to simply come up for a blessing if you chose. It would be unusual, in an Episcopal church; but I would hope that no one would comment, any more than they would mention someone choosing not to take Communion. Those decisions are between God and the individual.
The first time my church (big downtown church in a mostly catholic city) had the imposition of ashes it was also my first Lent as a Christian, but I had some of the similar feelings you are describing. I asked to receive ashes on my hand so that it would not be so obvious AND so that I wouldn't be what felt to me like the only person still sitting in the pews while 800 other people got up.
Now I love the ashes--as a sign of mortality in our death-denying culture, as a sign of faith (even as a liberal intellectual) in a culture that finds that closed-minded at best, and also as a mark of participating in Christian community that reaches well beyond me and my denomination and even my time period. I will miss the ashes this year, as I live in a Muslim country and the protestant churches here are in much the place of the presbyterians you describe growing up with.
I found that Lauren Winner's book "girl meets god" had a wonderful chapter about ash wednesday and her experience of wearing ashes. maybe it's something to check out (if you haven't already).
my two cents have expanded--i wish my actual money would do that. I'm done now. :-)
happy almost beginning-of-lent.
Grace, I didn't grow up with Lent or ashes but I've found both to be enriching to my life. I find having ashes put on my head a profound experience each time I participate. I think of, "dust to dust, ashes to ashes in the sure and certain hope of the Resurrection".
I go across the street to LH's church for the Ash Wed. service because Little Church doesn't have this service.
There are a number of things I didn't grow up with that I see happening in the PCUSA which jar me. One is seeing a Presby pastor wearing one of those tab insert clerical collars. Another is seeing decorated "altars" in the sanctuary. Or people using a contemporary passage from say, LETTERS FROM THE BIRMINGHAM JAIL (worthy those MLKJr's. work is) as a text for preaching rather than the Bible. Or using wiping cloths or any additons to the baptismal service. I could go on.
Hmmm...I grew up in a church that never mentioned Lent or ashes. Meanwhile all my RCC friends growing up had a smudge on their heads all Wednesday. None of them were able to articulate to my satisfaction what that smudge was about, only that to be a "good Catholic", you had to go get one before school.
Fast forward 20 or so years. The most profound worship experience so far of my life was an Easter Vigil I was "required" to attend when I was in the Reformed Worship and Sacraments class in Seminary.
We will do the impostion of ashes next week. Some will come up, and some won't. A few will want the ashes on their hand. It's between them and God,as far as Im concerned. The grace of God does not hang on whether there are ashes or not, I think. Thanks be to God!
Wow, QG - I never thought of it this way. Our service is in the evening which is something I did on purpose because I remember the girls in my high school who did not act too religious otherwise parading around with their midday ashes on ther heads.
This year I am going to go out of my way to make it comfortable for folks to either come up or not come up.
Thank you for the different perspective.
Like some of the other Episcopalians who have commented here mentioned, this is something I grew up with. We also always washed our faces before appearing in public.
This year I will spend Ash Wednesday at my internship. Their tradition is that rather than have the clergy mark all of the people, the ashes are passed around and each person marks the person sitting next to them. I have never experienced this before and it will be interesting to see what it's like and how it feels different.
I guess there's not really room in this situation for those who prefer not to have ashes, but in the high church style of this congregation ashes are pretty much taken for granted.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us. I always learn something from the experiences and traditions of each person on our webring.
I totally understand the problem, and I grew up Episcopalian. In fact, many years ago (I was about 22) I was in Boston for a workshop/training on Ash Wednesday, and I went to the Cathedral for AW service at noon.
The workshop began that night. Before we left to meet the group, I washed off the ashes. My (I later learned, Jewish) roommate expressed surprise that I'd done so, and certainly BOSTON was full of ashy people that day. But it seemed so wrong to me, like wearing my prayers on my face and not in my heart.
I grew up with a lot of Catholic friends, and they always had to eat fish sandwiches when we went to McDonald's on Fridays during Lent. The ashes on their faces all day...seemed just about as meaningful to them as their dietary restrictions (not very!)
I'll get ashes this Wednesday night at the 7 pm service. But won't be going out in public with them.
I understand how you may be torn about the Ash Wednesday service. I am a Methodist, and our church observes the event with ashes to the forehead. Personally, I find that Matthew 6:16 challenges public fasting of any kind, and that it should be a personal and private thing, just between you and God. I do not and will not contest those who accept the ashes on Wednesday, because sometimes we do not know all the answers. We just have to follow our heart, and do what makes us closer to the Lord, and what leads us to a life that serves Him..
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