Monday, January 19, 2009

Mom of Congress: Reporting For Duty


With all the excitement in the media over tomorrow's inauguration, you are probably wondering what the Mom of Congress is doing.

I'm resting up at home, conserving my strength for what promises to be a very busy legislative season in Washington. Already a division is appearing between some Democrats and the new President's policies vis-a-vis the economy which may require CongressMom's intervention if a food fight ensues.

Although there have been requests for CongressMom to intervene in the impeachment fight between the Illinois Senate and Governor, they have been refused. Unlike Congress, the Supreme Court and the Executive Branch, CongressMom has a sense of proper jurisdiction and boundaries and must set a good example. But I must say, I am sorely tempted! CongressMom's powers are limited to the discipline and training of the Congress of the United States. I must keep my focus.

To that end, I am collecting several Time Out Chairs and looking for an appropriate Time Out Room in the Capitol. Specifications for the room include: no TV access, no wireless for the Blackberries, no IPods, and lots of blank wall space for the Congresspeople to stare at until they are ready to return to the floor and work well with others.

The virtual Texas Towncar of Justice is in the shop, getting an oil change, new tires and extra back seats installed so that squabbling CongressPeople can be separated while transporting them to and from the Time Out Room.

Meanwhile, I thank President Bush for his service to the country and for keeping us safe from attack since 9/11. I pray that President Obama's administration will successfully address our country's foreign and domestic policy challenges over the next four years, because we are all in this together despite our political differences.

Now I have to start packing. Where are those Mom jeans, the Martha Stewart-button down shirt and the loafers? And the stickers. Can't forget the stickers.

10 comments:

Princess of Everything (and then some) said...

We are at your service!! Always on call to fight the good fight!

And if there is a food fight, will you please call me?

Jane Ellen+ said...

I think you are wise not to overextend yourself. However, you might consider appointment of State CongressMoms. I doubt that Illinois is the only state to have times when a Time Out Room would be useful.

Digging out my Mom clothes in Montana...

Presbyterian Gal said...

*runs in quick*

Here! Don't forget these,

*hands over personal chalkboard tablets, chalk and erasers*

For the timeouts where they must write the Constitution over and over!

Fergus Carrick said...

I keep hearing about how President Bush has kept us safe from follow-up attacks after 9/11. It is awfully difficult to give kudos for a negative. Should I also congratulate and thank him that we haven’t been invaded by little green men? Maybe the long lens of history will in fact show that the actions of this administration have indeed kept invaders at bay. Until then, I’m reserving judgment . . . . but wondering if the end justified the means.

Red_Cleric said...

PLEASE make sure that wherever the "time outs" take place the press doesn't have access. If they do they'll just spin it as a time of reflection on their great mandate from the people.

It's not very MOM-like but have you considered tasers? I like the ones with the little barbs so you don't have to chase them...

We remain on call if you need us.

Peace,
Alan

St. Casserole said...

Thank you for getting the TTof J ready. I'm sorry about the diet coke cans, gum wrappers and chip bags in the back seat.

Mindy did it.

ElastiGirl said...

lol @ St C -
I'll be happy to Mom this state!! I'm used to squabbling boys...

Quotidian Grace said...

By the power invested (?) in me as Mom of Congress, I hereby appoint ElastiGirl Mom of the Texas Legislature and Jane Ellen Mom of the Montana Legislature.

That leaves 48 states who still need a Mom of the Lege.

Rev Kim said...

I join you in thanking President Bush for keeping us safe, and for much else that he did while in office.

mibi52 said...

I'll take up the cause here in the great Commonwealth of Virginia, where our legislative bodies most definitely need adult supervision!