In response to Mac's challenge that the song wasn't really sappy, Reformed Catholic composed a new closing stanza (see comments on the previous post!):
Santa woke on Christmas Eve
hungover like a sailor,
Mrs Claus was thrown in Jail,
for DUI test failure
Claus drank up all the bailout cash
and Rudolph smoked his entire stash
Oh woe is me OH woe is me
They repo'd my double wide trailer.
And THAT, Gentle Readers, is a truly sappy stanza in the style of "Please, Daddy, Don't Get Drunk For Christmas"!